Tag Archives Healing

How to Love Freely When You Fear Abandonment

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My fear of abandonment had made the experience of loving people a very heavy and chaotic experience for me. My efforts at love have almost always been an attempt at possessing those I love so that they may never leave. From micro-managing their loyalty to throwing “tantrums” whenever it felt like their affections were being drawn away from me to someone else.  I had often wondered, why as a great lover of love my relationships often felt like a burden that I couldn’t wait to unburden myself from. That’s because I always tried

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To Those Who Are Terrified of Letting Happiness In

I always felt more peace when I was hurting or playing out unhappy scripts in the story of my life because that’s the only thing that has ever made sense. Pain seemed like the most consistent thing in my life. And anything that rocked up in my life that seemed to contradict that narrative? I became greatly anxious and restless because happiness was a very threatening thing in my world because of the unfamiliarity of it. So, on the arrival of happiness, I always made countdowns to when it would leave.

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